Monday, December 05, 2005
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Hey
So.
Mountain Dew is a thing of the past. I have conquered the addiction. I have triumphed. This is good.
I'm back on Effexor. Thank God.
Am I losing weight? No, not so much. Do I care? No. Not really. Being back on the Effexor has made me realize that I can't obsess over my weight, it makes me depressed which makes me eat even more which totally defeats the purpose of the Effexor.
So. Thank you all, for all of your support. This blog has served it's purpose. I won't be updating here again.
Mountain Dew is a thing of the past. I have conquered the addiction. I have triumphed. This is good.
I'm back on Effexor. Thank God.
Am I losing weight? No, not so much. Do I care? No. Not really. Being back on the Effexor has made me realize that I can't obsess over my weight, it makes me depressed which makes me eat even more which totally defeats the purpose of the Effexor.
So. Thank you all, for all of your support. This blog has served it's purpose. I won't be updating here again.
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Where Have I Been?
I've been hiding.
I've had Mountain Dew several times since my last post. And I have to tell you that, quite frankly, it sucks and I so much prefer Diet Coke. Sugared pop is gross. Isn't it amazing how your perceptions change? A year ago, I would have sneered at Diet Coke. Now, when I go to the restaurant that does not have Coke products, I drink Iced Tea.
I am not doing well with trying to lose weight. I am drinking my water but that's about it.
The bout of depression that I could feel coming on did just that. I have a vague sense of emptiness floating about me. It's not that I'm overly sad or want to die or anything, it's just this knowing that I am not happy and I have not been happy for a long time. It's not that I don't enjoy my life, I do, it's just that I have to force myself to enjoy it. There's something that tells me I don't deserve happiness. Which is stupid, I know. But hey, what are you going to do?
What I am going to do is this: I have made a doctor's appointment for Tuesday. I will be asking to be put back on Effexor. I remember the last time I was on Effexor and how much easier everything seemed to be. I was happy, I didn't eat all the time, I had energy because I was sleeping so much better. One little pill corrected a chemical imbalance and made things so much easier.
I know life shouldn't be this hard and I am looking forward to things being normal again. Wish me luck.
I've had Mountain Dew several times since my last post. And I have to tell you that, quite frankly, it sucks and I so much prefer Diet Coke. Sugared pop is gross. Isn't it amazing how your perceptions change? A year ago, I would have sneered at Diet Coke. Now, when I go to the restaurant that does not have Coke products, I drink Iced Tea.
I am not doing well with trying to lose weight. I am drinking my water but that's about it.
The bout of depression that I could feel coming on did just that. I have a vague sense of emptiness floating about me. It's not that I'm overly sad or want to die or anything, it's just this knowing that I am not happy and I have not been happy for a long time. It's not that I don't enjoy my life, I do, it's just that I have to force myself to enjoy it. There's something that tells me I don't deserve happiness. Which is stupid, I know. But hey, what are you going to do?
What I am going to do is this: I have made a doctor's appointment for Tuesday. I will be asking to be put back on Effexor. I remember the last time I was on Effexor and how much easier everything seemed to be. I was happy, I didn't eat all the time, I had energy because I was sleeping so much better. One little pill corrected a chemical imbalance and made things so much easier.
I know life shouldn't be this hard and I am looking forward to things being normal again. Wish me luck.
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